OPINION

Ursula Stickelmaier, IDS arts editor:

My favorite thing about Taylor Swift has always been her lyricism. The metaphors and beautiful prose she weaves into her songs is not only my favorite thing about her music, but it’s become a large part of the standard I set for other people’s music, as well. So, when I heard that she had a new album coming out, my initial reaction was excitement. The news that this album would be produced by Max Martin and Shellback, who both previously worked on Swift’s hit pop album “1989,” only added to the feeling. My expectation was that the album would be a mix of the poetic lyrics of songs from her more recent albums like “The Tortured Poets Department,” “Folklore” and “Evermore,” with a more pop music beat.

Instead, what I got was just over 40 minutes of cringe-worthy music that strayed so far from her songs I know and love that I was unsure if she played a hand at writing it at all. It felt like she had been aiming for a Sabrina Carpenter-style album and woefully overestimated her ability to make double entendres catchy and fun. Even when Carpenter sings alongside Swift on “The Life of a Showgirl,” the closing track of the album, the song felt more natural and sounded better during Carpenter’s parts.

Two weeks ago, I would have said that any new music from Swift would have been a good thing. Now I’m not so sure. For an artist that has defined most of my life, I do not say this lightly: “The Life of a Showgirl” is not for me.

Abby Whited, Jacobs beat reporter:

I came away from this album thinking, “Wow, Travis Kelce is a horrible muse.” Not that Swift needs to be in a place of heartbreak to write good music; in fact, she’s shown before that it’s possible for her to be happy and in love and still write complex, nuanced music (see “invisible string,” “Enchanted,” “Delicate,” etc.). This album unfortunately wasn’t that.

As someone who grew up with her music, I know what she’s capable of creatively. She’s an amazing songwriter and considered to be one of her generation’s best lyricists, but this album doesn’t align with that artistry. There are glimmers of it, but they are overshadowed by the record’s cringey, poorly-written moments.

Besides the abysmal lyrical moments on this album, one of the most disappointing aspects of it is the disconnect between how it was marketed and what the music turned out to be. She described it in her announcement as a solid collection of “pop bangers,” and promoted her return to working with Max Martin. She mentioned how she and Martin had spent a few years apart, honing their craft, and that they came together for this record aiming to create great, concise pop music.

Martin and Swift have a history of making bulletproof pop music together, so I was excited to hear they were collaborating again after so long; hence my confusion once the album actually came out. The quality baffles me. The Martin production isn't enough to save the songwriting from its fate of being cheap, uninspired and embarrassing.

Molly Gregory, news editor:

Guess who’s jealous of Sabrina Carpenter? (Insert Wendy Williams-esque dramatic pause) Taylor Swift! When I first listened to “Wood” by our beloved blonde woman, I felt like I was having a stroke. Where the tongue-in-cheek innuendos should have felt coy or shocking to the listener, they instead felt forced and uncomfortable. Swift’s strengths lie in her lyrical symbolism, her storytelling. Imagine my surprise when I heard the lyric “Redwood tree, it ain’t hard to see // His love was the key that opened my thighs.” Hello? Not once in my life have I found myself wondering about Travis Kelce’s “New Heights of manhood.”

Along with the AI slop Swift’s team has been using to promote this profound miss of an album, this swiftie is feeling betrayed.

Andrew Miller, co-editor-in-chief:

I should preface this by saying I don’t usually care for most pop music. That said, I gave this album a listen with an open mind because I know just how much Taylor Swift means to millions of women and people in general around the world.

First: she should fire all of her producers. Gunna has better beat selection. Second: nearly every song sounds uninspired, lyrically and musically. The standouts for me were “Wi$h Li$t,” the single interesting vocal performance, and “Opalite.” Make your own sunshine :D.

Briana Pace, visuals editor:

The album does not deserve all this hate. Are its lyrics as powerful as they are in past albums? No, but that doesn’t mean it’s not good.

Why is this album treated differently than any other fun girly pop music? Yes, there are some lyrics that are cringey, but that’s nothing new for Swift.

I’m sick of seeing everyone act like they’ve been a Swiftie for years. When “Reputation” was released, it was too different than anything she’d done before. “folklore” and “evermore” were too slow and too pretentious and “The Tortured Poets Department” was too wordy, but now everyone wishes “The Life of a Showgirl” sounded like those albums.

People wish Swift dove into the dark side of fame in the album. She did that on her last album and people started posting pictures of her childhood home and asking, “This is the asylum where you were raised?”

Saying “Wi$h Li$t” is a dog whistle for eugenics because of the lyrics “Have a couple kids, got the whole block lookin’ like you,” is crazy. If you cannot understand that just means she wants to have a lot of kids with her fiancé, please seek help.

“Actually Romantic” is not making fun of drug addicts. Charli XCX has made cocaine part of her brand. I mean, she released a coke inspired vinyl of “Brat.” Even if Swift was making fun of XCX for doing coke, which she did not, I think it’s fair game.

If you ask me my thoughts about the album and I tell you I don’t hate it, but you do, keep it to yourself. Don’t start dogging on the album. As my mom told me growing up, “Don’t yuck someone else’s yum.”

Lily Saylor, arts editor:

To preface, I am by no means a Swiftie, but I did have high hopes for her new album. From the way she marketed it, I was expecting a theatrical, jazzy and vintage-esque album that explores the highs and lows of fame, but that was not the case.

“The Life of a Showgirl” started out strong with “The Fate of Ophelia,” a light and bouncy track that I can’t get out of my head. However, the album quickly went downhill with sloppy, millennial lyricism and a boring pop sound that has been done a million times over. I have no issue with women expressing their sexuality in their music, but “Wood” was honestly just too cringey to enjoy and was obviously a cheap rip-off of Sabrina Carpenter’s flirty and playful lyrics.

To me, Swift’s new album is lazy and insulting to her very loyal fan base. She has proven in her previous albums, like “folklore” and “evermore,” that she is more than capable of intelligent, meaningful lyricism and of producing songs with depth. “The Life of a Showgirl” has anything but.